He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
