just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
