on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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