I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
