my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
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