Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
