All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
