so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
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