My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
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