My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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