OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
