Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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