I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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