are you so shy because you have an std?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
