She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
we're so committed to being not committed
last night I used snow as a chaser
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
