i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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