You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
