question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
