I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
she told me i tasted like america
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize