so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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