But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
being pregnant is like rehab
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
