We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
