Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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