have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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