We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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