When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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