dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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