Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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