I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
