i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
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oh god was she eating orange peels again
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
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So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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