do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
