Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
