Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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