it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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