you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
