New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize