What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
