fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
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