And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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