Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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