I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Bring me that man meat
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize