yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
It's shark week go big or go home
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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