I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize