Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago

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(708): View more from Illinois

Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.

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(404): View more from Georgia

They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.

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(917): View more from New York City

And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.

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(303): View more from Colorado

There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat

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(901): View more from Tennessee

Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...

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(231): View more from Michigan

JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good

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