I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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