Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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