Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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