You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
