I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
