its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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